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procrastination |prəˌkrastəˈnāSHən, prō-|
noun
the act of delaying or putting off something: the first tip is to avoid procrastination.

Who would have imagined that the dictionary could hold the answer to decades of struggling with procrastination.

Avoid procrastination. Such a simple yet effective solution.

While we’re at it, let’s advise overweight individuals to avoid overeating, individuals battling depression to evade apathy, and remind beached whales to steer clear of staying out of the ocean.

However, “avoid procrastination” is only helpful advice for fake procrastinators—those who casually claim to procrastinate by checking social media during work. They are the same individuals who might nonchalantly suggest to a genuine procrastinator, “Just stop procrastinating, and you’ll be fine.”

Both the dictionary and fake procrastinators fail to grasp that for a true procrastinator, procrastination isn’t a choice—it’s a behavior they struggle to control.

During my college years, I found myself in a constant state of personal freedom disaster—I rarely did anything without a pressing reason. The only exception was when I had to submit papers, which I usually completed the night before. Eventually, I discovered I could push it to the early morning on the day the paper was due. This behavior peaked when I couldn’t start my 90-page senior thesis until 72 hours before the deadline. This ordeal led me to the campus doctor’s office due to numb, curled-up hands as a result of low blood sugar from the stress. (Yes, I submitted the thesis, but it was far from impressive.)

Even writing this post took longer than expected since I spent hours distracted by random thoughts like analyzing a picture on my desktop, pondering a fight between individuals in the image, and delving into the internet for information on who would win between a lion and a tiger (the tiger wins, by the way). It’s safe to say I have my struggles.

To comprehend why procrastinators engage in procrastination, let’s start by examining the brain of a non-procrastinator:

Seems normal, right? Now, let’s look into the brain of a procrastinator:

Notice any discrepancies?

It appears that the Rational Decision-Maker in a procrastinator’s brain coexists with a pet—the Instant Gratification Monkey.

This would be amusing if the Rational Decision-Maker knew how to handle a monkey. Sadly, he wasn’t trained for this, leaving him at the mercy of the monkey, hindering his ability to perform his duties effectively.

Essentially, the Instant Gratification Monkey is the last being qualified to make decisions—he is solely focused on the present, ignoring past lessons and disregarding the future, purposing only to maximize current ease and pleasure. He fails to comprehend the Rational Decision-Maker, just as the Rational Decision-Maker is unable to fathom the monkey—why keep jogging when stopping feels better, why practice an instrument when it’s not enjoyable, why work on a computer when the internet beckons for playtime? The monkey perceives humans as irrational.

In the monkey’s world, he has it all sorted out—eating when hungry, sleeping when tired, and avoiding difficult tasks make for a successful monkey. However, for the procrastinator existing in the human realm, the Instant Gratification Monkey is an inept guide. Meanwhile, the Rational Decision-Maker, trained for rational choices but unprepared for monkey confrontations, struggles to resist—he feels increasingly defeated as the suffering procrastinator he oversees criticizes him.

It’s a chaotic situation. With the monkey steering the wheel, the procrastinator lingers in a realm called the Dark Playground.

The Dark Playground, familiar to every procrastinator, is where leisure activities occur in inappropriate moments. The enjoyment derived from the Dark Playground is tainted by unwarranted guilt, anxiety, self-loathing, and dread. Sometimes, the Rational Decision-Maker intervenes, forbidding normal leisure activities, and since the Instant Gratification Monkey opposes work, the procrastinator finds himself in a puzzling world of unproductive activities where everyone loses.

Meanwhile, the dejected Rational Decision-Maker ponders how he let the individual under his care end up in this predicament yet again.

In such a quandary, how can the procrastinator ever accomplish tasks?

Interestingly, there’s one thing that deeply alarms the Instant Gratification Monkey:

The Panic Monster remains dormant most of the time but emerges forcefully as a deadline looms or when the prospect of public humiliation, career setbacks, or other frightening consequences arise.

The usually composed Instant Gratification Monkey is petrified of the Panic Monster. Why else would the same person who struggles to write a sentence over two weeks be able to stay up all night, fighting exhaustion, to write eight pages? Why would an exceptionally lazy individual suddenly embrace a rigorous exercise routine except for a Panic Monster induced fear of becoming less attractive?

Unfortunately, some procrastinators don’t respond to the Panic Monster, and in dire situations, they find themselves climbing the tree with the monkey, spiraling into a state of self-destructive shutdown.

We certainly are an interesting bunch.

Living this way is unsustainable. Even for the procrastinator who eventually accomplishes tasks and remains a competent individual in society, change is imperative. Here are the primary reasons why:

1) It’s unpleasant. The procrastinator wastes significant time in the Dark Playground, time that could have been joyfully spent on well-deserved leisure if tasks were handled logically. Additionally, panic doesn’t bring joy.

2) The procrastinator undersells himself. By underachieving and falling short of his potential, he accumulates regret and self-doubt over time.

3) The Have-To-Dos take precedence over the Want-To-Dos. Even if the procrastinator manages well in a job where the Panic Monster is present, the other important facets of life—fitness, culinary skills, hobbies, personal growth—remain neglected because these activities rarely evoke the Panic Monster’s response. Pursuits like these enrich our lives and bring immense joy, but for most procrastinators, these priorities are postponed indefinitely.

So how can a procrastinator evolve and lead a happier life? Refer to Part 2: How To Beat Procrastination.

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Watch My TED Talk on Procrastination

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