Recently, back home during the holidays and given the task of organizing the attic, I stumbled upon a box—sealed with tape, covered in dust, and clearly marked as “TIM’S STUFF” with double underlines. Oh yes, that box.

Upon my high school graduation, I made a decision to collect all belongings that held sentimental value to me and pack them into a large cardboard box. That was 14 years ago.

With faint recollections of its contents, I chose to open it up. Inside, I discovered old school assignments, report cards, writings, pictures, recordings, event tickets, and numerous letters. It turned out to be a peculiar day for me.

Initially, it’s been intriguing—realizing how many things I remembered inaccurately, prompting me to reconsider past memories.

Secondly, I’ve experienced a rollercoaster of emotions, teetering on the brink of breaking down.

However, primarily, I spent seven consecutive hours cringing. Viewing yourself and your friends as teenagers is akin to watching the most cringe-worthy reality show ever produced. Here’s why:

Individuals familiar with those aged 9 to 23 know they often pose more challenges to the world than contributions. The teenage years, particularly between ages 12 and 16, are notably tumultuous. The reason this reality can be overlooked is that those who interact with teenagers include peers who are similarly unaware, parents whose views are clouded by affection, and professionals who have a soft spot for teens. Those in a position to truly perceive teenagers seldom engage with them, leading to a lapse in understanding their nature.

However, this was not forgotten as I delved into this wealth of firsthand materials—recalling the mindset behind the actions of my friends and me.

To all teenagers reading this, especially the younger ones: While you have the right to lead your lives, bear in mind that your behaviors likely diminish the overall quality of society. Though I cannot alter your behavior, I shall offer some basic advice to minimize the potential embarrassment you may cause to yourself and humanity:

1) Refrain from trying to sound profound under any circumstance. Adolescents are seldom profound, and you are no exception. For instance, if at 16 you feel compelled to craft a philosophical story in red ink with tiny capital letters, evoking a sense of supreme connection, it’s advisable to A) suppress such feelings, B) keep the experience private, and C) discard the narrative. Reading it later in life, with clearer judgment, will shatter the inflated image you hold of your teenage self.

2) Display gratitude towards your parents and avoid entitlement. In a world where the vast majority prioritize trivial matters over your well-being, there are one or two individuals, if you’re fortunate, who would sacrifice everything for you. Yet, do you reciprocate this with entitlement and unappreciativeness? Your attitude resembles that of a show horse:

3) Implement a no-photography rule for girls aged 11-13 and boys aged 13-15. In hindsight, it’s akin to demystifying an unsavory process.

4) Boys aged 13-14: Your emerging sexuality may unsettle others. Not long ago, you were cherished for your innocence. However, the changes you’re undergoing repel the rest of the world, including your parents. The issue lies in:

5) Girls aged 12-14: Avoid fostering a culture of cruelty and tears. Few individuals are as ruthless towards their peers as girls in this age group. Instances abound where cruelty pervades relationships, leaving lasting scars.

6) Understand the repercussions of sporting an awkward hairstyle in your adolescence.

7) Acknowledge that your teenage infatuation doesn’t equate to love. While the feelings are valid, they often stem from hormonal surges and may not endure. It’s essential not to sacrifice enduring relationships, college aspirations, or scribble misguided love notes in yearbooks over fleeting emotions.

8) Avoid adopting extreme ideological stances in your adolescence. Fanaticism at a young age seldom garners favor among peers.

9) Interpret gestures from acquaintances with discernment and maturity, particularly when met with abrupt changes in behavior. Address any unbalanced interactions with prudence and self-awareness.

Teenagers, consider your actions carefully, for your current existence may strike a balance between amusement and mortification—one that your future self could well do without.

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