For those of you who are frustrated with the delayed posts, here’s Why I Can’t Post On Time.

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“Clean your face before bedtime so that angels will descend and give you a kiss while you sleep.”

When I was a young child staying at my grandmother’s house, this is what she told me. At around five years old, I took this advice from a trusted source in stride, considering it quite normal for someone to say to me.

I was raised in a Reform Jewish family that celebrated Christmas and Easter, creating a unique upbringing where I heard stories like:

• During Christmas, an overweight middle-aged man breaks into our home in a less-than-efficient manner, leaves wrapped gifts, and then exits by going back up the chimney, being carried by large, wingless flying mammals to repeat the process billions of times in a few hours
• On Passover, an invisible man silently enters the house while we eat to have a sip of wine
• During that same period, a 10-foot-tall rabbit enters through the wall, leaving chocolate eggs scattered around
• When a tooth falls out, a flying woman visits while I sleep and buys the tooth from me
• Furthermore, without being told that fiction exists, I assumed Sesame Street creatures were real biological entities

Given the fantastical nature of the tales I was told, encounters with flying intruders due to face-washing seemed entirely plausible. It felt like a regular occurrence since such events were frequent in my world.

These narratives were presented alongside my lessons in English, shapes, colors, and bathroom etiquette, forming a substantial part of my early education. When I was introduced to the concept of “Oh, that’s all make-believe,” it left me bewildered and questioning. Feeling like a novice striving to acquire knowledge, I was abruptly faced with the revelation that many of the exciting elements were false while the mundane aspects were true.

As I probed further, the convoluted web of lies tangled my thoughts. Dragons were imaginary, but dinosaurs were real. Kings and princesses existed, yet wizards and fairies were figments of imagination. Disney World was authentic, but Sesame Street was not. Farm animals were real but far from their fictional depictions. Pirates and Native Americans were real but less stereotypical, while witches and ghosts were entirely fictitious. Touching a toad did not cause warts, eyes could be crossed without risks, and Michael Dukakis, despite winning a classroom poll in a landslide, was not a viable political contender.

Resolute in trusting only myself, I segregated information into categories of “false” and “real,” seeking clarity by assigning new facts to either group. Upon encountering ambiguous information, I sought clarification, and one day, I questioned my father about God. His response, “Some people believe in God, while others don’t, and everyone must decide for themselves,” irreversibly placed God in my “false” category, shaping my identity as an atheist. To seven-year-old me, this decision was as natural as rejecting Santa Claus or fairies, having become cynical about extraordinary phenomena following numerous disappointments with the fabricated aspects of reality. I adopted the rule that “If it seems too good to be true, it probably isn’t,” applying it to evaluating the concept of God no differently than other supernatural characters.

However, my father’s reluctance to outright dismiss God puzzled me, growing increasingly baffling as I matured. My steadfast rejection of anything defying natural laws solidified over time, supported by personal experiences and societal consensus, except for one discrepancy—I found most Jews and Christians, older and wiser individuals, embracing belief in God. Even skeptics appeared hesitant to outright deny it. Few were candid about their disbelief. This perplexing discrepancy led me to question the status quo, wondering, What’s really going on?

As my understanding expanded, I realized I stood in stark disagreement with the majority—a whopping 96% of Americans believed in God, with high beliefs in Heaven and Hell, and a significant portion adhering to literal interpretations of religious texts. I discovered renowned scientists like Isaac Newton were deeply religious, contrasting starkly with societal disdain for atheism, branding it pejoratively and advising discretion, particularly in political ambitions.

Initially frustrated by my inability to comprehend the profound influence of faith on many individuals, by college, I had completely shut down spiritually, alienating myself from discussions on the supernatural, divinity, or higher powers. While I partook in family celebrations and cultural practices, I distanced myself from religious doctrines, finding organized religions dogmatic, hostile to change, and fixated on past ideologies. Graduating as a fervent atheist, my arrogance, typical of a 21-year-old, showcased my naive certainty.

Unbeknownst to me at the time, identifying as an “atheist” simply meant being “not something.” I had unwittingly discarded a significant aspect of human development by defining my spirituality based on what I rejected. While claiming atheism, I was akin to stating I was not from Uganda when asked about my origins—essentially labeling myself as spiritually uninvolved.

Back then, I saw no issue with this spiritual detachment, relegating spirituality to the realm of religious adherents while aligning myself with scientific reasoning. What I failed to recognize was that I had disregarded a crucial component of human consciousness and psychological growth.

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Exploring Spirituality

Spirituality ranks among the least appealing words due to its nebulous and bothersome nature, alienating both the religious and non-religious individuals. Even among self-proclaimed enthusiasts, defining spirituality varies significantly.

So how do we interpret spirituality today, and why is it essential?

Since humans achieved self-awareness, they have been inquisitive beings, eager to uncover the mysteries of existence. While science answers the question of what the world is, spirituality delves into the question of its meaning.

Science deals with known facts, while spirituality navigates the philosophical, psychological, and emotional understanding of those facts. Science provides information, and spirituality aids in processing and accepting that information. Together, they form a partnership—the scientific knowledge prompts us with new revelations, and spirituality helps us grapple with their implications. When confronted with astonishing scientific discoveries, like Earth orbiting the sun, spirituality ponders, “How does this alter our perception of ourselves, the world, and life itself?”

Under this context, spirituality transcends religious bounds, emphasizing a philosophical and psychological aspect. The misconception of spirituality being at odds with science is debunked by Carl Sagan’s perspective:

“Spirit” roots in the Latin word for “to breathe,” symbolizing breath and matter, even when thin. Contrary to popular belief, spirituality encompasses matter, including the brain. Science intertwines with spirituality, providing profound experiences through cosmic awareness and life’s intricacies. Sublime revelations of existence and humility induce a spiritual essence. Viewing science and spirituality as mutually exclusive undermines both disciplines.

As humanity progresses, science and spirituality must harmonize, perpetuating mutual growth toward higher consciousness and wisdom. Science offers pathways for intellectual expansion, while spiritual insight guides the utilization of those paths.

On an individual level, the pervasive challenge remains evading a state of unconsciousness—ignorance leading to baseless decisions, moral compromises, misplaced priorities, fear-driven choices, and time squandered in procrastination. Science cannot address this issue; only spiritual growth can provide clarity and direction.

Defined in this light, spirituality proves not only acceptable but indispensable for human advancement, nurturing intellectual potential and flourishing.

Despite the profound significance of spiritual development, contemporary society overlooks its importance. The relegation of spirituality to obscurity, overshadowed by organized religion, may be attributed to several factors:

• Fear: Religion capitalizes on fear to offer solace through definitive answers and the promise of immortality, yet studies indicate that closeness to God does not guarantee greater life satisfaction.
• Evolutionary tribalism: Humans are predisposed to tribal affiliations, inclining toward sacred ideals that foster cooperation, inspiring a sense of belonging and moral purpose.
• Evolutionary divine inclination: Speculation regarding human proclivity to believe in the divine, positing that watchful eyes lead to honesty, altruism, and cooperative behavior.
• Sigmund Freud’s theory: Proposes that individuals seek God as a paternal figure, advocating for their emotional security.

Amidst these influences, subtle, secular spirituality is marginalized, dismissed by non-religious groups as “not for me” and overlooked by the religious adherents who rely on structured dogma for spiritual nourishment, seldom exploring the contemplative spirituality we discuss.

Given the importance of spiritual growth, what steps can individuals take towards meaningful and enduring spiritual exploration? Establishing a personal spiritual framework that resonates and offers guidance could be the first step. In my experience, this process has proven effective and will be elaborated upon in subsequent posts.

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About Tim Urban

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